


Nightmare

by Anonymous



Category: Incarceron Series - Catherine Fisher
Genre: Camping, F/M, Non-Consensual, Post-Canon, Rape
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-15
Updated: 2017-06-15
Packaged: 2019-08-21 06:50:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16571726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/





	Nightmare

Sometimes, Attia was still amazed at the size of the sky. Even though it had been three years, now, since the Fall of the Realm, since Sapphique (Sapphique! Sometimes she was still amazed at that too) had led her Out and into the glorious expanse of forests and meadows and stars, even though it was by now feeling mostly normal to have a blue sky and green forests - sometimes, she would still look up and see that space, filled with so much _nothing,_ and think, _oh._

Up ahead of her, Keiro stretched out his shoulders with a self-satisfied noise. “Wonder if we should stop here?” he called back over his shoulder. “The horses seem to be getting a little tired.” 

She looked down at her own horse and had to agree; he’d been stumbling more and more frequently, and the sun was starting to sink down anyway. “Sure,” she said, and pulled him to a halt at the roadside. Attia slipped gracefully down and followed Keiro as he led his own horse off the track a little ways, so they would be out of the way of anyone else coming along. 

King Giles and Queen Claudia’s court was beautiful, of course, and they had assured Attia and Keiro many times that both were welcome there, but even it could get stifling sometimes. So over the last year or so Keiro had taken to travelling more and more frequently, just in order to get away and to see more of the Realm, and she had taken to joining him. _Like old times,_ Giles had said, playfully shoving Keiro the last time they had asked leave to go. Keiro had blushed, almost, and hadn’t answered. 

Attia set up their bedrolls while Keiro dug out a small fire pit and lit a fire within it, by which time the sun had slipped further down and the forest was starting to fill with shadows. However, the orange dancing light was more than enough to make their small camp cozy. 

They settled themselves down next to the fire, Attia with her feet pulled up tightly beneath her and Keiro stretched out. Behind them, the horses cropped grass, the tearing of stalks loud in the evening calm. They didn’t speak as they ate; there was no pressing need to. Why bother to break the calm of this dusk unless they had something to say? 

She shivered; he slung an arm around her shoulder. “Cold?” 

“Little bit.” 

“C’mere.” He squeezed until she was leaning up against him, and rubbed his hand along her arm. “Better?” 

“A bit.” At least she had a windbreak on one side. 

Keiro continued to rub over her shoulder and back. She had to admit, it felt kind of nice. An involuntary shudder ran up her spine. “Hey Attia,” he said teasingly, so quietly it was almost a whisper. “Look. Listen. There’s no-one around.” It was true; nobody had passed them on the path since they’d stopped, and even before that the woods had been very quiet. “You know what I think we ought to do?” The slight smile that had been on his lips all evening broke suddenly into a leer, as he tilted his head to bring their faces closer. 

Attia froze. Sure, she had no complaints about Keiro’s company in the general sense, but she had never thought about ever doing that with him. “Um,” she began awkwardly, uncertain how to refuse in a way that wouldn’t be terribly rude. 

“What?” His touch slipped down from her shoulders to the small of her back, the curve of her waist. “Don’t you like it?” 

“Keiro, I don’t think I want to-“ 

“Oh come on, yes you do,” he said. His hands tightened around her hips. 

She flinched away, but he just seized her tighter. He was close enough now that she could feel the heat of his body, and her legs were still trapped under her so she couldn’t stand. 

“Keiro, stop!” She raised her hand and punched at his chest, trying to force him off her. 

He caught the blow easily, and snatched up her other wrist too, taking them both easily in one hand. And with one push she was lying down, shoulderblades in the dirt and vulnerable stomach up, her hands pinned up above her head and legs trapped underneath him. “Let me go!”, but not even a bird was startled by that cry. 

Keiro’s free fingers brushed her knee, and a shudder ran up through all her nerves. No, no, he had to stop, please, make it stop - 

Her thigh, now. He bent his head and pressed a kiss to her shoulder, just above her collar. It burned there like a coal. 

She’d always disliked the crinolines, the petticoats, and the miles of ruffles that characterized the fashions at Giles and Claudia’s court, and knew she’d made some enemies by refusing to wear them, going around always in simple draped skirts. Right now, she’d give anything for those hateful fashions, for another barrier between her and him, as his hand slipped under her single layer of skirt, his fingers pinched around the drawstring of her bloomers. And then those were down too and the leaves crunched in the small of her back, and _no_ she wanted to say again but her voice wouldn’t work, her lungs were too busy fluttering in her chest like panicked birds - 

It wasn’t even fast; she didn’t even have an option to squeeze her eyes shut and pretend like nothing was happening. Keiro raped her as gently as true love itself, his breath warm and lips soft on the side of her neck. and when he was finished with her he released her hands and smoothed her skirt back down, in some mockery of care. 

She didn’t get up. Not even when he moved back to the other side of the fire, and laid himself down to sleep as though it had been nothing. She couldn’t get up. Not even when the fire burned itself down low, and another gust of wind sent more leaves spiralling down to fall onto her face and body. Just numb, numb as the cold ground and the starless abyss of sky above the branches. 

Eventually, the Moon rose, a smear of grey peeping through the cloud cover. Eventually, it drifted up above the treetops, and a silver beam fell down between the branches and smote over her face, like the breaking of a fairy-tale spell. But all wrong now. All broken. A sob tore its way out from between her lips, and that one loosed all the rest, and Attia curled onto her side and wept as she had never wept before. Tears streamed from her eyes and dripped into the leaf litter, dirt gathered beneath her fingernails as she clawed at the ground, her hair, her skin and found no relief. Entire body wracked with sobs and ruined as the Moon, she howled out all her pain and desperation there into the forest, wishing that he were dead, or she were, or that she had never existed, just something, anything, please - 

And the forest gave no answer at all.


End file.
